beck - beercan

label: DGC
released: 1994

once upon a time i'd been at a friend's house. i'd known he and his family for quite awhile. they always invited me over for thanksgiving and whatnot. i had a crush on his sister. he and i had similar tastes in music. i used to make multiple mixtapes because why not. he was always a recipient of one of them. i'd once made a tape of nothing but the bands brutal truth and clutch. it was a 60 minute tape. one side was all brutal truth. one side was all clutch. and i'd titled it....get ready for it because it's pure comedy gold: A BRUTAL CLUTCH. see what i did there? of course you do. during 99.9% of my visits to my friend always involved me smoking pot. i know. i'm a disappointment. the only downfall to doing that while there was it always meant that i had to walk home that way. he lived on one side of town and i was on the other. don't get me wrong. the walk was fine. on any other day it would've taken me about 20 minutes to get there. but on the other days it seemed as if it took me 3 days to get home. and i'd always walk with a walkman. yeah. those were the daze,man. listening to music was something that i'd like to do while high. i'd even gotten a special pair of headphones for just that occasion. they covered my entire ear. so i'd be walking along and then i'd see the bridge. the problem was that once i saw the bridge it took forever to reach it. and then once i was on it it took just as long to get to the other side. and then i was at the halfway point. and then there was the walgreens i'd walk by and always be tempted to go into because some hawaiian punch and some plain m&ms always sounded amazing at the time. but i was high. i was high out in public. and that's something that i didn't really like to be. and then i'd start to talk the urges down with the thoughts of the food i had at home. i was never really sure if it was all in my head or i was saying all of this out loud. that would explain the looks i'd be getting. they were either says "you're right. a microwaved burrito sandwich does sound good." or "what did we tell you about being around people? didn't you get the memo? i'm going to have to talk to roger again! fucking new guy! can't do anything! he only got that job as a favor to his mother!". i don't know what it was because of the headphones and all. so i'd finally made it home and found all of the foods i'd wanted and took everything to the couch. and there i sat. still with the headphones on. i'd been listening to side b of beck's MELLOW GOLD. "mutherfuker" was my jam.

and suddenly BAM! i was jolted awake.
and i'd slid off the couch and onto the floor.
fucking noise was everyfuckingwhere.
you know that one scene in BACK TO THE FUTURE where marty puts those headphones on his sleeping (SPOILER ALERT!) dad's ears and plays music because he'd wanted him to think he was from the future?
yeah.
exactly like that.
i'd fallen asleep.

some of you may not know what i'm talking about.
if you were to play the cassette tape version of MELLOW GOLD there's an unlisted track of noise and whatnot after a period of blank space after the last song.
that sort of thing doesn't happen here.
you're safe.

i should also take this point in time to mention that the same sort of thing happens on nirvana's NEVERMIND.
and it goes by the name "endless,nameless".

so don't make the same mistake i did.
this has been a public servie announcement.
thank you for listening.

DL