Friday, October 2, 2009

black elk - always a six,never a nine

released 2008

now...i've been receiving reports that some of you believe that SGM has been going soft

and because of that... some of you have been calling it such things as "nancy boy"...and putting cigars out on it's arms and legs...and making it parade around in a dress in front of your poker friends...and spitting into it's mouth while it's sleeping

well...i'm here to tell you all to stop it...not because it's mean and whatnot...but because SGM considers that kind of business foreplay...and we've been finding all kinds of weird things in the carpeting around the office (we wanted shag carpet...not dreadlock carpet)...and the bagel guy is now afraid to go into the break room without an escort for fear of what SGM will be doing with the cream cheese

so unless you want these kinds of shenanigans to keep going on...please stop

usually we here at the SGM offices get down with this kind of stuff on the first night...and we'd usually be right behind you in line with a lit cigar and a mouthful of spit at the ready...we can't allow these things to happen around the office because all of the surrounding businesses in the mini-mall are complaining about having to see all of that in the window as they're passing by...and apparently it's "bad for business" if you'd like SGM to appear at your birthday party or graduation or new years eve party or spaghetti wednesdays at your house...just drop us a line at the email address provided over in the top left corner of this here blog

now that we got that out of the way...hopefully this album will make you think otherwise of SGM and make you see that even though we may have gotten temporarily "soft" was only doing so to lure you into an alley

you can find the band's first album way over yonder

by listening to'll hear the dirty drunken blues of the jesus lizard...some hammerhead...some fight amp...some mule (the band's vocalist tom glose could almost pass for mule's p.w. long in some places)...

this entire album should be played during a night of pursuing alcohol poisoning...and will also work during the hangover and realization that you've once again woke up with SGM in your bed the next day

that's what folks like to call a "win/win sitcheeashun"

DL: always a six,never a nine


Employee said...

hands down, my favorite album from '08. I would love if this made it to vinyl!

Clint said...

wow, SGM must be psychic or something because the other day when i heard that Killdozer canceled and Black Elk is now opening for the Jesus Lizard, i was all "who's Black Elk?" now that i know who Black Elk is i gotta say this album fucking kicks ass. thanks SGM, but do me a favor and get out of my head. despite the convenience of getting a request before i ask for it, i just don't trust you in there alone. last time i found sticky fingerprints and wet kleenex's everywhere. yuck.

Anonymous said...

this band is awful and one of the most boring live acts whose show i've experienced "sitting through" as "suffering through." cannot fathom what all the fuss is about, except for this reissue spirit that has everyone going these last few years.

i enjoy your blog, though. thanks.

Nurzeratchet said...

Well, I for one disagree with you and as you should come to know, nothing is truly great unless it is both hated and praised. Guess you didn't get asked to open for TJL, huh.

catchpa: priphro

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