jucifer - calling all cars on the vegas strip

released in 1999

i was lucky enough to be right up in the front to let my eyes and ears drown in the joy that is jucifer live...singer amber valentine is able to produce frozen mollases with her guitar strings while singing like an angel and a banshee...drummer (and amber's mate) ed livengood hits the drums like john bonham never existed (he literally played himself off of his stool more than a few times)...and all of this goes on under the watchful eye of multiple amps that tower over them from behind

but before they were the sludgy behemoth they are today...they had more of a pixies meets melvins kinda thing going on

what drew me to the band was the video for the song "superman"...i was at home in the kitchen...and i had the tv on in the background...and as i was making a sammich...this heavy HEAVY song came over the speakers...so i rushed back into the room to see only 2 people making this heavenly noise...a dynamic duo indeed

so here you go...i'm thinking you know what to do

http://www.sendspace.com/file/vp8ctm

and now this...

12 rounds - my big hero

released in 1998

i witnessed this band in chicago back in 1998 at the aragon ballroom...they were opening for marilyn manson as part of the promo run for the mechanical animals album (yes...i was at a marilyn manson concert...it's all part of my dark past...we've all been there)...originally i was under the assumption that the band rasputina were opening (which would've been just as ok...but when the curtain went back and there stood 12 rounds...my nips got a little hard)...everyone around me was a little more than confused as to what the gender of the singer was (female)...and i a stood there waiting for them to play the song "pleasant smell" as i had just recently discovered them through the showing of the video for said song on the mtv (remember mtv and videos?)...needless to say that i was probably one of the few that left with a tshirt that night

and the marilyn manson part of the show...um...seeing him in a sexless white costume (as seen in the "the dope show" video) and standing at a pulpit tearing apart a bible and throwing the pages into the audience...let's just say that the eyeliner wearing crowd had something to talk about in study hall

as for the music...it could be described as portishead and nine inch nails making dirty gothic psychobilly jazzy love on halloween while nick cave sits in the corner and watches

that's quite the image right there...go on...get that in your head

this was the band's second album...and they have a third one recorded and ready for public consumption...but for some reason it was put on hold (and that was back in '98-'99...so it's not looking so good)...and the band has been on hiatus since about the same time

so...if you're looking for something to accompany the flickering of a candle...do it

http://www.mediafire.com/?esimyvymglt

questionable gender songs

jesus
elvis
bob ross

and now...you can add my name to that list
i've returned (albeit for only a few hours)

apparently they like it when you pay for your usage of the internet...i had no idea seeing as how i didn't receive that memo...so i've been having to make the walk to the local library...and let me tell you...it's strange to have to be wearing pants while in front of a computer

i'd also like to take this opportunity to thank a one mr. gray for holding everything down...if it weren't for him...i'd never know the multiple joys of waking up drunk next to random midgets and smelling of birthday cake

and i'd also like to give a big UPS to the 28 of you that follow this blog...it's nice knowing that this short bus is getting a little bigger

and i'd also like to thank the random members of bands that frequent this blog and don't get all lars ulrich-y about things

we here at the SGM are gonna continue bringing you the product that you so desire (NOW WITH MORE AFTERTASTE!)

as for the colostomy grab-bag...honestly...i just don't know...part of me wants to delete it from the blogosphere...and part of me wants to keep it around because i feel sorry for it (i'm sure most of you know that feeling)...who knows what'll become of it...give us your input on that...we like your input...we really really do (and yes...we were totally saying that as we raised our eyebrow and licked our lips)

and we're going to try and stretch out the boundaries around here a little...it's called "adapting"...get used to it mr. uptight trousers

ok...so...seeing as how i'm here for a limited time...i'm gonna make some insertions...and i know how you all like insertions

and i know that most of you are wondering what a david hasselhoff soap dispenser has to do with any of this...and the answer is this: it has everything to do with everything...and if you even had to ask that question...why are you here?

Shallow, North Dakota - This Apparatus Must Be Earthed

Label: Sonic Unyon

Year: 1997

Big time sludgy, metallic, thick necked, thud rock out of Canada. Nasty, spiteful stuff that makes a nice blend of Unsane + Cursed (which there's a member connection) + Tad + Milligram. You get a lot of rumbling riffs that go from molten magma to hot spitting lava (volcano reference!), meaning they can get all doomy or kinda thrashy, but mostly it's mid-tempo hammering. Just know that it is heavy. Really, that's pretty much the gist of it. Also, if you were ever into hardcore music, you stand a better chance at liking this one, just cause you can tell the dudes in this band are/were into hardcore and that vibe comes through. Also, there are a few moments where they get a little experimental on that ass and throw some noise, or found sound, or sickeningly de-tuned instruments into the mix, so if you're prone to like things that veer off into the neither regions of metal, than you'll also find happiness here.

The band started out in the early 90's releasing two albums (this one being the second, I don't have the first one), then went AWOL for awhile before showing up in 2004 with a new record (that also fucking slays), and now they're AWOL again. Hopefully, they will resurface sometime soon to bludgeon again, but until that day, please enjoy this trip into the Great White North.

DL

Loudspeaker - Rubberneckers Vs. Tailgaters

Label: Sympathy For The Record Industry

Year: 1994

Well, since the other Loudspeaker record I posted seemed to be a popular item, may I present to you the follow-up album. And if you grabbed the first one, then you know the drill, cause this one sounds pretty much the same. If you didn't grab the first one, this is bluesy noise rock, that features members (at one time or another) of Pussy Galore, Swans, Foetus, Boss Hog and Crucifix, so you get this Helmet smoking two packs a day kind of NYC dirt rock. It's good alright. Have I steered you wrong yet? I mean, you like black tar vocals right? You like bass that emanates from below the street right? You like the guitar to scrap in and out of the song structure right? Right?!

DL

Cows - Effete and Impudent Snobs

Label: Amphetamine Reptile

Year: 1990

More Cows. More fan-fucking-tastic shit to listen to. More weirdness.

This album is sometimes considered the last of the "original" Cows sound before they switched gears a bit and began relying more on dynamics and song structure than flat out white noise. The guitar has zero low end, it's a squealing pig running all over the songs. The bass is fuzzed out throb. The drums are...well, you ever watch the Muppet Show, you know Animal, the drummer for the house band? And on this record especially, the vocals are blown way out. The whole mix is painful, the antithesis of your mom's Leo Sayer albums. 

Like the Butthole Surfers post below, here's a good chance you have this already, but in case you don't here it is. I'm sure eventually I'll post all the Cows records on this blog, it's just something I'm compelled to do. You young folks need to have these things on your Ipods to bum you out while you're...doing whatever the fuck young people do. Yachting? Do you guys sail much?

DL

  

Butthole Surfers - Locust Abortion Technician

Label: Touch And Go

Year: 1987

Hey...look who's back from visiting his parents in Virginia for Christmas...me. Sorry for the lack of posts, but you gotta celebrate the baby jesus every once in awhile.

As a result, I have some stuff on my computer that I need to either post or dump, so why not make a steaming, corn riddled post? Great idea!

You should know this record, and most likely should own it, it's a "classic" as it where. You should also be painfully aware of what Butthole Surfers sound like, but in case you don't...drop LSD and listen to Roky Erikson and Black Sabbath simultaneously. There you go, that's what they sound like. In all honesty, I was never a huge fan of this band, and certainly the records that came out after this one are utter crap. Not to mention they and their bloated egos almost put Touch And Go out of business, but that's a story for another day. My point being, this, to me anyway, is the one Butthole Surfers record you need. It's the heaviest, the darkest, and has the best songs. They mix fast and slow, guitar based, and non-guitar based, and basically make a fucked up mess that somehow coalesces into very listenable noise rock. 

If you don't have this for some reason (maybe you're young, maybe you had it on vinyl and it scratched, maybe you heard the 90's version of the band and [rightfully so] ignored them, or maybe you're a big homophobe and just the mere mention of "buttholes" is too much to take) then you should look into it now, it stands the test of time. 

Of course, you see what label this is on, so when the link disappears, it's gone for good.

DL

Cavity - Supercollider

Label: Man's Ruin

Year: 1998

I know Hydrahead reissued this record after the fact and added two songs, and omitted one from the original release, but I don't own that, I own the Man's Ruin version, so that's what you get.

In a long and distinguished career peddling southern fried sludge, Cavity went out on a high note. A really, really high note. Prior to Supercollider, Cavity were the Florida version of Eyehategod, misanthropic, bathed in feedback, strangled vocals, and bludgeoning at every turn, they were really good, but had yet to release a record that would elevate them from the Florida swamps. Then, along comes this monster, holy shit. This album smoothed out some of the rough edges, and created massive waves of warm, suffocating tone. The songs ebb and flow, always heavy, but now allowed more dynamic breadth than before. Even the vocals had gone from screeching to bellowing, again, honing the attack. This record should have been huge, but with Man's Ruin about to fold under financial pressure, it just kinda languished. By the time Hydrahead got around to re-releasing it again, I think the thunder was gone.  It's too bad, because with all the faux stoner metal around at the time, the world needed Cavity's Black Sabbath by way of Black Flag assault. They stuck around and put out two more albums, both of which are really good, but Supercollider is the turning point of their sound. Essential.

I once had Cavity play my house in Athens, Georgia, and even though there were only a handful of people there, they still slayed, threatening to cave the entire house in. Interesting sidebar, my roommate slept through their set, a mere 10' away from the band atop a pile of his dirty clothes. Try doing that. Also, I learned that day that Cavity bassist Daniel Gorostiaga was in New Age Records straight edge band Powerhouse, and we shared a deep admiration for Chain Of Strength. Nice huh? Also, they had a member of the Miami band Load playing with them, and were perplexed that I could be, in my own words, "a huge Load fan". That dude was left on the side of the road before the end of that tour.

They have also had among their ranks members of Floor, Torche, Dove, and Where Fear And Weapons Meet, along with others. In fact, Henry Wilson plays on this record. 

DL

Boss Hog - Drinkin', Lechin', and Lyin'

Label: Amphetamine Reptile

Year: 1989

Maybe more famous for the cover than the actual music, this record is a nasty, bluesy, noise rock crawl through the gutter. This, the first record from the band, features John Spencer (formally of Pussy Galore, currently of Blues Explosion...you know, the band that shouts "blues" all the time, lest you forget they are a "blues" band), his wife (and cover model) Christina Martinez, plus a couple folks from Unsane and The Honeymoon Killers to flesh it out. You get what you probably are expecting from that crew, a droning, lethargic, punks version of what blues sound like. Say whatever you will about the band being douchebags or opportunistic assholes, but the Boss Hog records are all really good, and this one is my favorite. Plus, it's not long, so it makes for a good introduction to the band.

Interesting sidebar, as I was trying to find a cover image for this, I ran across a posting of this very record, in this very blog. Whoops. I guess I should have checked the archives first huh? Well, fuck it, I'm already this far...and chances are you haven't been scrutinizing this blog since day one anyhow. Apparently I haven't.

DL

Cure - Pornography

Label: Fiction

Year: 1982

There are a handful of bands that (in my mind at least) operate outside the parameters of "cool" and "uncool", bands that don't require a secret society to appreciate them. Nine Inch Nails is one of those bands, and Cure is another. Sure, the high school thespians made you want to hatecrime (now a verb!) the Cure back into the closet, but at the end of the day you cannot deny the gloom/pop masterworks of their early canon. It's original music that sounds like no other band, and that's hard to come by these days. Shit, it was hard to come by when this record came out!

Pornography is part of the concept trilogy that also includes albums Seventeen Seconds, and Faith, and is easily the darkest and most despondent of all their records. Robert Smith was quoted as saying, "I wanted it to be virtually unbearable"...I mean, shit, what the fuck?! Don't be fooled into thinking the Cure is for fat goth girls, or "fags", it's really not. Really. If you like any droning, psychotic, art damaged rock, then this just might be for you. If you think you hate the world...try these songs on for size.

DL